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Apr 05

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Despite the overblown hype about pink slime, many restaurants and grocery stores have decided not to use or carry products that contain it. McDonalds, famous for golden arches, "healthy" salads that contain more calories than its burgers, and diabetes, no longer uses the product. Buy Cipro Without Prescription, Taco Bell, which was in the news recently for using a meat mixture that was only 35% beef and practically vegan, also no longer uses pink slime in its products. The beef industry itself has succumbed to consumer hysteria and will now start labeling its meat products that contain the pink slime. Presumably, the stickers will have little frowny faces and text that reads "This ground up cow with trace amounts of cow shit and E. coli also contains pink slime. It was also produced within a five mile radius of a factory that uses peanuts, because OMG NUTS!"

People have become obsessive over food and it's time to stop. Approximately 5% of the population suffers from gluten sensitivity and yet Whole Foods has entire aisles of gluten-free products, because idiotic people assume that if a product is "something-free" that "something" must be horrible and should be ostracized and beaten with sticks, Buy Cipro Without Prescription. (Marketers, here's an idea: Market your product as "free" of something it never contained to begin with. Put "Now with NO baby monkey testicles!" stickers on your graham crackers and consumers will immediately assume the other graham crackers MUST contain baby monkey testicles!) At grade schools you can't open a jar of peanut butter without having the bomb squad called in. The craze of "organic" food has also become mainstream, despite all food being "organic" in the chemical sense (unless you've been eating spatulas and detergent), launched to popularity by its embrace of the naturalistic fallacy (i.e., whatever is more "natural" is "better"---even though a bear attack is also natural). However, I can accept organic foods (sometimes they emphasize good farming practices and ethical treatment of animals) and nut allergies (these allergies can be fatal) and even gluten-free products (whatever). But this outcry against pink slime is just stupid. If pink slime grosses you out, then don't eat meat. Drink a fruit smoothie instead. Just don't mix any strawberries in because the result may look like PINK SLIME.

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About the author

Dustin Martinez

I'm a laid back guy. I love pizza! I never know what to write in these things! I constantly think of suicide and stand perilously before the ominous void of nonexistence. I have two dogs and I love tennis!

4 comments

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  1. Bill from Dover

    Yummies!

  2. Tomas

    So what kind of animal flesh is not at least somewhat repulsive (if you were raised to think of it that way — most of the worlds’ population has no queasyness toward animal food)? I watched a Cambodian devour barbequed cockroaches with great relish!

    We don’t eat “horsemeat” but we do eat “pigmeat” since we have a sanitized name for it — “pork.”

    Pink slime is simply a kind of lean sausage given a gross name. Why don’t we call “sausage” “ground pig meat, organs, and waste products?” Have you read the ingredients in chorizo? Lymph glands and connective tissue?

    How about, say, yoghurt? Sour milk slime? Butter, “cow fat slime?”

    C’mon!

  3. Dustin Martinez

    Yep, before I went vegetarian I’d eaten various insects, balut, tongues, hearts, tripe, and all sorts of things most meat-eaters in the US would consider gross. Actually, I think I’d still even eat insects as a vegetarian. I doubt there’s much environmental impact on producing those foods and I’m not really worried about the cognitive capacity of an ant to feel existential dread and conscious pain.

  4. Y.

    So?

    The cheaper it gets, the better for the rest of us who like protein, no matter where it comes from.

    Is it worse than eating squirrels or girl scouts?

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