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Sep 29

Buy Casodex Without Prescription

Buy Casodex Without Prescription, Early yesterday morning at Columbia University in New York, scientists at the biological theology institute managed the impossible. Casodex in japan, They had cloned God.

"Everyone told us that it couldn't be done, buy Casodex online with no prescription, Over the counter Casodex, " smiled lead researcher Denny McDaniels. "But where's their God now?" He then pointed at God, Casodex in uk, Casodex paypal, who he had cloned, in the corner of the lab, where can i buy Casodex online. Saturday delivery Casodex, For years, scientists had always insisted that science could not address theological questions, cod online Casodex, Casodex in australia, much less clone God. But in a scene reminiscent of the movie Jurassic Park, the researchers at Columbia University managed to isolate some of God's genetic material in a surprising, but in hindsight obvious, manner, Buy Casodex Without Prescription.

No, Casodex from canadian pharmacy, Casodex gel, ointment, cream, pill, spray, continuous-release, extended-release, they didn't find a mosquito trapped in amber that had once sucked on Jesus' divine blood. Instead, purchase Casodex online, Casodex san diego, they took the genetic material directly from Christ's body.

"One of my Catholic friends mentioned to me that he had eaten Jesus, where can i find Casodex online, Buy cheap Casodex no rx, " said Timothy Lane. "After all these years of saying absurd things like this---'I've just eaten Jesus, buy Casodex without a prescription, Casodex for sale, ' 'I just drank the blood of Jesus,' 'Jesus sort of tastes a bit like a stale cracker'---it finally dawned on me that perhaps he was being serious, Casodex trusted pharmacy reviews. Buy Casodex Without Prescription, As it turns out, Catholic priests know magic and can turn crackers into pieces of Jesus' body. Delivered overnight Casodex, This was exactly the kind of breakthrough we were looking for in our quest for cloning God."

With the cooperation of a rogue Catholic sect, the research team was finally able to secure a piece of Jesus, Casodex in usa. Casodex medication, "Our earlier attempts to get a piece of Christ ran into all sorts of difficulties," said one of the researchers, over the counter Casodex. Casodex pills, "Being scientists, we don't understand things about god and churches and weird mystical rituals, buy no prescription Casodex online, Buy Casodex no prescription, but we nevertheless had to send in some agents to try to find one of these mysterious Jesus crackers we had heard about." He continued, "We were probably run out of at least eleven churches before we found one that was willing to cooperate with us, Casodex in mexico. Order Casodex from United States pharmacy, Most of them were horrified when we said we wanted to clone their Jesus crackers. Others were horrified by the way we dressed and acted---we wore Amish-style beards and primitive and somber clothing and continually burst out into song and spoke in jibberish and beat ourselves silly with self-inflicted wounds---from our perches among the scientific elite, this is simply how the religious types seemed to us, so petty and small, Buy Casodex Without Prescription. Thankfully, where can i buy Casodex online, Casodex in india, in the end, we found a church that really did act in this way, Casodex from canadian pharmacy, Buy generic Casodex, and they accepted us with open arms and gave us full use of their Jesus crackers."

With the Jesus crackers in tow, the researchers began testing the materials immediately back at the lab, Casodex prescriptions. Online buy Casodex without a prescription, "We took the crackers that had been turned into Jesus and used the latest in genomic technology to scan it for traces of viable DNA material. After a week of scanning, buy Casodex online cod, Casodex tablets, we hit the genetic payload---a full genome for God!"

Of course, the research was not without its ethical dilemmas, buy Casodex online with no prescription. Casodex in australia, "Some of us wondered whether we could be artificially inducing the second coming of Christ, and hence Judgment Day, Casodex overseas, Casodex in uk, " said Denny McDaniels. "What if we cloned Jesus, buy Casodex without prescription, Buy Casodex from mexico, and he woke up all groggy and confused, and then all his angels with the trumpets and shit came down and were all like, Casodex from international pharmacy, Casodex buy, 'Hey Jesus, aren't you a bit early?' and then Jesus might say, buy Casodex from canada, Free Casodex samples, 'It's not my fault; these idiots brought me here early with their dastardly science!' and then the angels would say, 'Damn you, buy Casodex online without a prescription, Casodex prices, science!' and being scientists who hate god and know nothing of arcane and foolish religious matters, we'd already be off to a bad footing, cod online Casodex, Online buying Casodex hcl, so certainly waking Jesus early could be problematic for us."

Thankfully, these ethical problems never surfaced, where to buy Casodex. Casodex discount, God was cloned quite uneventfully, and now sits in the corner of the lab with a rather docile expression, Casodex to buy. Casodex craiglist, Of course, after cloning the wheat-based crackers that had been turned into Jesus, order Casodex online c.o.d, Casodex over the counter, researchers were confronted with a surprising revelation concerning the nature of God. "We never would have thought, buy Casodex online without prescription, Casodex in us, " said one of the researchers, "that God would turn out to be wheat." Said Timothy Lane, next day Casodex, Purchase Casodex, "I think this explains all the seed-sowing parables, if you ask me.", Casodex price, coupon. Order Casodex online overnight delivery no prescription. Casodex in japan. Real brand Casodex online. Casodex in canada. Sale Casodex.

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About the author

Dustin Martinez

I'm a laid back guy. I love pizza! I never know what to write in these things! I constantly think of suicide and stand perilously before the ominous void of nonexistence. I have two dogs and I love tennis!

17 comments

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  1. Christismysaviour

    Funny funny stuff lol but you forget one thing,God isnt wheat your an idiot.
    You cant clone God because he loves all of us and JUST EBCAUSE YOU CANT SEE HIM DOESNT MEAN HE DOESNT EXIST why dont you get it? your such a moron

  2. Mebilg

    Yeah, you can’t clone god because he loves all of us! Wheat on the other hand has a seething hatred for every human, and thus submits itself to the cloning process. Why don’t you get it, moron, you can’t see god because he exists!

  3. foiegras

    Happy blasphemy day !

    Thanks for the post !
    Next, how to breed chocolate easter bunny ?

  4. Lizz

    priceless.

  5. Flavin

    Is that first commentor for realz? Allow me to temporarily disable my grammar circuits… There we go.

    I think he forget one thing, crackers arent god hes an idiot. JUST EBCAUSE YOU CAN EAT GOD DOESNT MEAN HE EXISTS. your such a moron lol

  6. Engineer-Poet

    What made this tickle in my brain
    Is how it goes against the grain.

  7. Miss Lu

    I think this is my favorite post so far.
    Very funny.

  8. Liew

    There’s something called Blasphemy Day?!

    …I think my brain just had an orgasm.

  9. Poet-Warrior

    Laughed and enjoyed this very much. God is a cracker. BTW – Christismysaviour’s comment is sooooo Godly and Christian. LOL.

  10. Alistair

    Ha ha ha, that guy, Christismysaviour, such a moron!
    Dude, way to believe in a fairy tale.

  11. Nancy

    There is only one problem with this article I laugh so hard my eyes water which makes it hard to read the rest of it. Glad I found this site.

  12. Jordan

    “JUST EBCAUSE YOU CANT SEE HIM DOESNT MEAN HE DOESNT EXIST”
    I totally agree with that, but since when were we talking about the Flying Spaghetti Monster?
    Obviously, the cracker is a metaphor for the holy act of cannibalism, like how you can tell if someone truly loves you when they try to dine on your flesh.

  13. an outsider

    I don’t get it. The whole thing read pretty weak to me… just a bunch of lame ad-hom attacks and no real satire. The Onion this is not.

  14. Saint Gasoline

    Outsider, you probably don’t get it because you don’t realize that “ad hominen” is only a criticism within the context of an argument, not a humor piece. With that in mind, it also isn’t surprising that you don’t understand the humor.

  15. Nanobelle

    Epic win, Saint G!
    @Engineer-Poet, many lulz :)

  16. diane (remember your mom)

    yo dude, call me & your blog aint so bad either

  17. Matthew

    Dude, you’re funny. Ever-so-slightly mean, but funny.

    One question: how did they manage to distinguish and decode all three Genomes? Must have been a big jumbly mess in there.

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